Years of Going Through Several Sizes of Clothes ...

As my weight loss has been somewhat slow for the past approximately 6 months (I have slowly gone from about 126.5 to 120.5) it is starting to dawn on me that the years of going through several sizes of clothes are finally coming to an end. Let me repeat that. AN END. The years of going through several sizes of clothes are finally coming to an end.

My weight gain journey started in puberty. At age fourteen, my paternal grandmother died and all eating structure in my life pretty much evaporated overnight. Preceding my grandmothers death I had already lost my mother and learned to turn to sweets for comfort. After my grandmother died I became a hardcore sugar junkie. Breakfast white bread toast with cinnamon sugar and hot cocoa. Now and Later candy on the way to school. Little Debbies Star Crunches, ice cream sandwiches and chocolate milk for lunch. A Snickers bar in the afternoon for a snack. A stressful "family dinner" often steak, pink with blood running on the plate that sickened me. Or maybe pancakes with maple syrup and powdered sugar. YIKES! Sounds pretty awful. YES, it was.

No wonder, now that I can be, now that I have the power and ability to assert myself I am so picky and demanding about my food!

Since I was fourteen I do not beleive that my body weight has EVER been stable for ANYTHING like a year. I don't think it has EVER been stable for more than four months. This is a painful realization that I confess. But it is the truth.

SO you can imagine that I can hardly fathom that the years of going through several sizes of clothes are coming to an end. I have been wearing the same jeans, shirts, slacks, skirts and dresses for months. I suspect this will continue. Think of all the time and money I am going to save by not having to buy several size wardrobes each year? Because I am on a non-hoarder. When my clothes become to small I don't hang on to them, just in case, I let them go and I give them to charity. When my clothes become to big, I don't hang onto them, just in case, I let them go and give them to charity. This means cycles and cycles of clothes. Of course I keep these purchases limited to less pricey venues ... Target for reasonably prices Moissimo shirts and jeans, thrift stores for a real bargain, throw something decent I can fit into during a trip to Walmart to pick up household items.

The Merry Go Round has not ever ended. Until now. The carousel music is fading as the wheel spins slower and slower. And I am getting used to myself. A new self that wakes up in the morning and does not have to worry "Will my jeans fit?" A new self that actually becomes less self-conscious because I don't have to think so much about what I can wear or what I can't. I new self that is not reeling from the binge and weight gain I just can't stop.

This is incredible. Simply INCREDIBLE!